New Website!!

I have officially joined the world of the blogosphere with my new website!

Please join me at dediKATEd2Love.com. 

My Life in Technicolor

This is a part of my private scrapbook from a few years ago. I share this because there is still such a stigma about mental health issues, & so many people feel stuck hiding their struggles & not getting the support they need. If this is you, you are NOT alone! Please open up to someone... anyone that you trust. Together we can wipe out the shame that goes along with these medical issues! 

Please feel free to share if you feel this may help someone else. 

"Lately I feel like I've been on this journey towards discovering myself & accepting myself for who I really am - the good, the bad, & the beautiful! 

I've struggled for a long time with the acceptance part, but I'm really starting to want to get there... which is a good first step. 

Part of my battle is struggling with my bi-polar disorder. For most of my life I've either flat-out denied it, or felt really resentful. 

But then God really showed me that part of the joy of who I am is that I live my life in technicolor. I may really struggle with balance in my life (who doesn't), but if I change who I am, then it would be like painting over the colours of my life with grey. 

Accepting myself means accepting the dark stormy colours with the bold, rich ones that I love. 

This scrapbook is a journal for me as my cheap version of therapy as I journey through my life in exploration of what it is that makes me tick... or sing, or laugh, or cry. Who am I & what am I all about are the questions, & my voyage to the answers is where I'm choosing to live my life in technicolor!" 

One of THOSE Days

Dear Friends,

Have you ever had "one of THOSE days"? If you're anything like me, you might even say, "yeah, how about TODAY!" But then, when I had a moment today to give it to God, this was His response to me...

"My precious child, EVERY day can be one of THOSE days... THOSE days that you can devote to me, THOSE days that you can choose to rejoice and turn your eyes heavenward, THOSE days that I will bless you either in the joys of life or the challenges, because BOTH of those are needed to get you to where I want you."

I am SOOOOO glad that today is one of THOSE days! Thank you, Jesus, for giving me a right perspective when things are not going the way I think they should.

Oh, and by the way, I am really hoping you are having one of THOSE days too! Today is one of THOSE days that I am praying for you, that I am loving on you, and that Jesus has got you in the palms of HIS hands!

Plot Twist!!!

Instead of wallowing, I am thankful for... AMA being WAY faster than they predicted (they quoted me at 2 hrs, but came in 20 min), caring co-workers that came to bail me out (THANK YOU to the two co-workers for the Chai Tea & caring), that the weather wasn't worse, that I had an opportunity to exercise humility (I HATE that I had to call AMA to change a lousy tire... those nasty lug nuts!) and that despite blowing out a tire, I am safe and didn't sustain lasting car damage! 

Thank you, Lord, for many mercies this morning... help me to remember that in the moment of frustration, and thank You that You are my Provider!

A Higher Perspective

Dear Jesus, help me to hear more & speak less. Help me to have Your perspective for others & not my own. Help me to love people to You instead of berating them for the areas I deem them less "holy" since without love I am nothing. (1 Corinthians 13). Help me to be Your sweetness to a bitter world that is longing for a place to fit. In Your beautiful name. Amen.

Just Keep Swimming

As I reflect on my many dear friends that are going through tremendous trials right now, I am grateful that God keeps us going when we have nothing left in us. Sometimes all we can do is "just keep swimming" & keep trusting Jesus to be in control! 

Yesterday was a really hard one for me! My energy was at an all-time low, & it hurt just to get through the day. I prayed that God would give me a reprieve... and He did! It was a short one, but I rejoice in the Lover of my soul & His great care for me! 

Regardless of what I feel, I KNOW that His love for me surpasses anything this world has to offer! I'm blessed beyond measure, & I cling to the Love I've just started to uncover. How wide & how long & how high & how deep is the love of Jesus! 

My Dear Friends, if this world's offerings fall short of your expectations, raise your eyes to the heavens & see His love for you!

Blessed to Bless Others

Have you ever had an experience where you have been hurt or offended? I assume that if you have lived on this earth for more than five years, you've probably come across these feelings at least once (maybe sooner if you have siblings 😋). 

This week I have been challenged to abundantly give my love, forgiveness, approval & gratitude to anyone that I have felt slighted by. Challenge is definitely the word! Let me explain what each of these things mean to me. 

Love - because God first loved me... in my yuck (technical word meaning sin)... I will choose to love those that have wounded me. I pray for God's eyes of love for them- to see them as He does

Forgiveness - I relinquish the right to call them to the carpet. I allow God to take over & for Him to dole out consequences as He sees fit.

Approval - this is not approval of the actions, but an acknowledgement that they are entitled to God's grace & mercy as equally as I am, & that God longs to restore them just as He longs for me to be fully restored. 

Gratitude - again, I do not have to be grateful for the action that caused my hurt, but I can choose to be grateful for the opportunity that it has given me to grow, develop in character, & lavish grace & mercy upon another soul, just as God has lavished His grace & mercy on my life. 

This has not been an easy lesson for me, as I am a human that is so used to the hierarchy of sins that we tend to have. 

"I know I'm sinful, Lord, but did You SEE what THEY did?!!"  

The truth is, My sins put Christ upon that tree as much as anyone else's has. HUMBLING. I encourage you, Friends. Practice lavishly giving these gifts to others. I can tell you that the freedom in doing so will CHANGE. YOUR. LIFE.

Reflection of Light

As I spent time in prayer this morning, my mind was brought to the many in my world that are going through terrible trials - trials I cannot even begin to fathom. 

I began to ask myself what my response, as a follower of Jesus, should be. In the past, I have offered little more than platitudes & cliches, thinking that somehow this would be helpful to my struggling brother or sister. 

As a talker, I have always felt that my words were necessary to provide comfort, when in fact my words are often not necessary at all. A quiet & humble prayer offered in sincerity to The Lord along with a choice to journey alongside my hurting friend is worth far more than meaningless prattle. 

My prayer today is that I would be a reflection of His heart, & that His love would be evident to all, that He will be glorified. When light is reflected in a window, we are captivated by the light, not the window. 

Jesus, purify my heart, & help me to be a true reflection of You in this hurting world.

To New Ponderings

Well, my Dear Friends, here we meet again on a new (well, sort of) platform. I'm encouraged by those who have voiced faith in me that I might have a sliver of offerings that can encourage & challenge you, as I am challenged daily. May we, as kindred souls, walk through this journey together with arms wide open, hearts lacking judgment & yet challenging each other to daily walk in grace & mercy closer to the heart of Jesus. 

You may chuckle with me at the whopping two whole blog posts that I managed to write before I gave up last time. Thanks be to God that He doesn't give up on me quite so easily!

Safe in the Hands of the Almighty

Two days of intense dizzy spells, & this is the verse I've been clinging to today. I know that He is walking with me, grasping tightly to my hand, & nothing, not even dizzy spells, can take me one inch from His side. My prayer is that Jesus will help me rest in Him as I return to work tomorrow.